Spiritual intimacy – the importance of shared values

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In the third of our insightful four-part series on strengthening marriage, Matt Loehr explores the profound importance of spiritual intimacy – or the intimacy of shared values – a vital yet often overlooked aspect of married life. You can watch the full conversation here.

Matt describes spiritual intimacy as akin to “welding two pieces of steel together that are unbreakable”, achieved through open and respectful discussions about your deepest beliefs and principles. Without cultivating this shared understanding, couples risk drifting into mere cohabitation rather than thriving as unified partners. Shared moral values, he stresses, provide direction, resilience, and clarity in an increasingly challenging world.

In this engaging discussion, Matt shares personal insights from his own marriage, illustrating how for him and his wife, regularly exploring their beliefs and values together has significantly deepened their bond. His simple, yet impactful weekly practice of a Bible study with his wife involves open dialogue about their personal values and how these shape their daily lives. As Matt puts it: “It creates unity. She feels valued. I’m listening.”

Importantly, Matt highlights the crucial role fathers play in establishing and reinforcing these shared values within families, noting that children are far more likely to carry these values into adulthood when actively encouraged by their fathers.

The conversation provides practical, reassuring guidance on overcoming stagnation or challenges in maintaining shared values. Matt encourages couples to approach building intimacy around values with patience, perseverance, and genuine commitment.

At C4M, we celebrate and support the profound strength that shared values contribute to marriages, families, and broader society. As real marriage continues to encounter various pressures, cultivating spiritual intimacy and a clear, shared vision within marriage has never been more critical. C4M remains committed to championing man-woman marriage, offering practical resources and meaningful support to couples devoted to lifelong unity.